Well, since I have been sick this week, it seems like self care is a timely "tip" topic.
Here is the deal.
When you are using or indulging in your addiction du jour, you aren't able to take care of yourself.
Those people in recovery who are given the "double whammy" of having grown up in an addicted home, may also have not even learned self-care skills to begin with.
This is nothing to be ashamed of; for it makes up the large majority of people in recovery. But it DOES need to be acquired as a skill in order to have sustainable sobriety.
This may sound simple, but, remember, the early stages of recovery are about going back and learning the elementary things we missed out on when we began indulging in our addictions.
So, it is important to start with the following basic step when learning how to "treat" yourself for self-care in the first months and years of recovery.
Make a List every day, either when you go to bed or when you arise, about the things you did to "take care" of yourself the previous day.
Ask yourself the following questions to start?
Did I eat? Sleep? Exercise? Shower? Brush my teeth? Take any necessary medications? Talk to someone who cares about me? Do Laundry? Pay bills or contact bill collectors? Do something toward recovery? Etc.
These are the BASICS, but, for so many of us, they are simply "thrown by the wayside" when addiction permeates our lives.
If you haven't answered yes to all of these questions, then, perhaps, you need to continue making this list until you acheive a higher level of "self-care" inventory.
And, then, when you are done with "the basics," it is time to move on to more "advanced" levels of self-care "treatment," such as:
cleaning your house, your car, buying yourself flowers, saying thank you to people who have been there all along, etc.
And, only THEN, do you get to start worrying about caregiving other people again..
Just for today focus on yourself. You are worth it.